to write a long and lovely post about the end of summer and standing between the seasons and just how beautiful it all is. however, tonite is not the nite for that. maybe tomorrow.
tonite, i have a sink full of dirty dishes, a to-do list with absolutely nothing checked off, a husband and baby asleep and two little girls so full of piss & vinegar they don’t know what to do with themselves.
tonite, i’m feeling crabby, flabby, out of sync, and tired.
tonite, i had planned to sew, create, journal, and cook a fantastic meal of chicken & dumplings with rolls and veggies – we had pancakes.
tonite, i’m resolved to wake up early in the morning, & take care of myself first. because it’s not a pleasant feeling when it’s 5 pm, and lovey’s on his way home from work, and i realize i’m still wearing my pajamas.
tonite, i’m debating whether i should drink the last of the coffee and clean like a madwoman or go ahead and call it a nite.
tonite, i realize that this is the time when i need to be here now, and breathe in and out and let the fullness of the frustration flow through and out of me.
and emma just came running out the kitchen screeching “mommy, i learned a new trick”. and i’m off to put into practice breathing and being, as i’m 95% certain i will not be impressed with this “new trick”.